Do you have questions about Confidence?
What is confidence – self-confidence – It is a feeling of security within our self about our self. With this feeling, we can behave calmly and positively in most situations, free of un-necessary doubts about our ability to cope – feeling secure – upbeat – composed – cool.
Self-confidence is an attitude, which allows us to have positive and realistic views of ourselves. We trust in ourselves. It’s a balanced view of our self and our abilities. Confidence is not about thinking that things will always go well, it is about the ability to cope with uncertainty and knowing that things might not go as we hoped, and dealing with them calmly. If we feel confident, we trust that we have the resources to deal with the situation.
If we are not self confident we depend on the approval of others, if people approve of us, then we feel good. We avoid taking risks because we fear we may fail. We often doubt ourselves and we have negative self talk. We feel we have to conform to be accepted and fear that if we do not conform then people won’t like us, so we learn not to say NO.
Many elements affect the development of self-confidence. A supportive home environment, is very important to our feelings about ourselves when we are small, particularly in our early years. When our parents accept us and tell us they love us, give us their time and encourage us, then we then feel good about ourselves and we develop confidence in our self and our abilities.
If our care givers are critical or demanding, put us down or discourage us, we may begin to believe that we are not capable of doing anything right, we are hopeless.
A negative self image gives a distorted view of our abilities and then we lose sight of our strong points. This can lead to a negative spiral of low self esteem and then progressively withdrawing from living fully. We might find we cannot handle criticism in our lives while at the same time blaming ourselves for all the problems we are having which then stops us from taking any risks in the present.
And this can go on and make itself known in other areas of our life:
• Fear of rejection
• Fear of giving a presentation
• Nervousness before a test
• Anxiety when meeting people
• Fear of driving
• Avoidance of speaking up at meetings
• Shyness in social events.
• Withdrawal from relationships
• Fear of Dating
• Inability to say NO when required
• Inability to be assertive
• Binge drinking
Much as a loving home environment is a good starting point for confidence, that is only the start. As we grow up we will also be affected by how others treat us, when we leave home. There are some things that would knock anyone’s confidence in themselves. It is not surprising that many people have a lack of confidence after they have suffered a set back in the personal or professional lives.
It is great to know that confidence can be learned at any stage of life. Because confidence comes from how we view ourselves and this is based on thought patterns and memories which are stored in the subconscious mind. Hypnotherapy can be very effective in helping people learn or regain confidence.
Clinical Hypnotherapy combined with NLP (neuro linguistic programming) can help to shape the way your mind thinks so that you can be drawing on many more tools, strengths, skills, abilities and strategies that you did not know were available to us.
Most people are surprised to learn that it is not only possible but straightforward to develop confidence and good self esteem. As negative thought patterns are just that a pattern, we can work to change those patterns to give the positive thinking that leads to self confidence.
No one can change what went on early in life years, but we can help you to let negative feelings go, and turn those negative thoughts into positive ones by relaxation, changing your negative self talk into positive, re-programme your beliefs and goals in a positive way, and see yourself in the future being that new confident you.
With the help of hypnosis and NLP you can teach your unconscious mind new patterns, remind it of your successes. Hypnosis will boost your confidence, and help you to feel more relaxed in situations which were once frightening, so that you feel better about yourself and start to plan for the future with confidence.
